There's no one left who I can safely like

I was talking to someone yesterday, and they made a comment about how arrogant those guys who sat with baseball caps on in sport stadiums are. I thought, "Fuck, I thought I could like those people. Who's left?"

Environmentalists are all skinny hippies with art degrees, the salt of the earth is just old dudes who aren't educated or old dudes who are educated but pretend not to be. Liberals are hypocrites, conservatives are fascists, the left wing is turning into the right wing and the right wing is turning into those people you see on the bus who are reading a KJV and want you to know it.

The problem that I'm having right now is that, for whatever reason, I haven't been able to fit into any social group. That would be awesome, under normal circumstances, because not fitting into a social group is, in itself, a social group, and they're pretty cool and they have chicks who wear jeans and shirts that say things that they don't understand.

The real issue with my situation is that I don't mind most of these people, with their social groups. I don't (oddly) even think I'm better than them. So I have no sense of superiority I can share with a collective, I have no struggle I can bring up with people and say, "Man, look at this struggle. It's fucking hard. I wish other people had to deal with this stuff, maybe then they'd understand us."

Most people understand me. There's not much to it. The biggest struggle I deal with is normally the fact that when I shower, I knock over my bodywash container a lot, and it leaks out and then I have to buy new bodywash, and that sucks, because then my bodywash costs are excessively high, and that's terrible.

So it's always been a delicate balance for me, finding some social group who almost everyone can agree to dislike, and finding some social group that everyone can agree to like. When I was 12, I just got some Yu-Gi-Oh! cards and I was in with that crowd, and then I pretended to like WWF and I was in with that crowd, and that was pretty much it. Most recently, I actively proclaimed my distaste for people who like My Chemical Romance and advocated a reevaluation of American morals so they'd jive with the kids of today. That worked for a while, but then everyone started hating My Chemical Romance and too many people finally realized what relativism was, and I was back to square one.

So I'm out of people I can like, I'm out of people I can dislike, and I'm out of bodywash.

Which is terrible.